BotTalk Reviews

Sword-brothers, sword-sisters, your local spinner rack is once again displaying another brand new issue of SSOC!  Sixty-four startling pages of barbaric savagery in black-and-white printed on newsprint paper! Inside this magazine you will find the following: Art pin-ups: Bêlit the Queen of the Black Coast by Nick Marinkovich Conan the Barbarian by Jordan Raskin CONAN: DWELLERS OF THE OASIS part 1: Deserted Goods and Shifting Sands by Jim Zub and Ivan Gil (Conan: Scourge of the Serpent) It's only eight months after the events of "A Witch Shall be Born". Turan on the shores of the Vilayet sea. Conan is still the leader of a band of Zuagir bandits. Conan and his raiders decimate the Turanian soldiers of King Yildiz. Conan is still suffering from his wounds, he remembers Queen Taramis of Khauran, Salome (an homage to the one who asked for the head of John the Baptist), Constantius aka The Falcon, his crucifixion (as seen in the Conan the Barbarian (1982) movie), Olgerd Vladis...

A thrilling manga prequel to the hit anime Grendizer U! Spoilers! Spoilers!  The cosmic league of nations is ruled by the evil Kingdom of Vega. Planet Fleed/Euphor is protected by a formidable weaponized Mech, Grendizer/Goldorak. Seven invasions by the Vega Star Alliance were repelled by Grendizer. We are introduced to: Gau Su Uls (Duke Fleed's best friend, a lycanthrope from Planet Uls, son of King Uls and a Starker Knight academy student, an homage to Morros/Pollux from episode 71 of UFO Robo Grendizer (1975-1977) and TV Magazine (01/1976)) Duke Fleed (the young prince of Planet Fleed/Prince d'Euphor, the most accomplished Knight of the academy) King Fleed (Father of Duke) Queen Fleed (Mother of Duke) Princess Grace Maria Fleed/Phénicia (Younger sister of Duke) Cassado Zeola Whiter (a sadistic Starker Knight, an homage to Whiter/Sogrady from episode 24 of UFO Robo Grendizer (1975-1977)) Only Starker Knights can pilot "Dizer" mechs. Only the mightiest of the Knights ...

Anyway Gang is Canada's coolest Alternative/Indie Rock supergroup quartet ever assembled:  Chris Murphy (Sloan), Dave Monks (Tokyo Police Club), Menno Versteeg (Hollerado) and Sam Roberts (Sam Roberts Band)! Additional guitars by Nixon Boyd (Hollerado). Trevor James Anderson and Gus van Go played some keys and guitars also.  Additional vocals by Alyson McNamara. Produced by Anyway Gang, Trevor James Anderson and Nixon Boyd. Additional production and mixed by Gus van Go and Werner F. Engineered by Nixon Boyd and Trevor James Anderson; Assistant Engineer: Zach Pepe. Additional Engineering by Mike Gnocato. Mastered by João Carvalho. Recorded at Noble Street Studios (Toronto) and at Banquet Sound recording studio (run by Nixon Boyd in Toronto). Cover art by Ben Marra. Band Picture by Calm Elliott-Armstrong.  Layout by Christina Zalec. A project funded in part by the Foundation Assisting Canadian Talent on Recordings (FACTOR), the Government of Canada and Canada's private radi...

48 restored and fully colored pages of barbaric savagery! Inside this magnificent full-color magazine you will find the following: Classic remastered art pin-ups in stunning color: Conan the Barbarian by Jeffrey Catherine Jones from Savage Sword of Conan (1974) #5 Conan the Barbarian by Tim Conrad from Savage Sword of Conan (1974) #13 Conan, Bêlit & Red Sonja ad by Pablo Marcos from Savage Sword of Conan (1974) #23 BLACK COLOSSUS by Robert E. Howard, Roy Thomas, John Buscema and Alfredo Alcala. (New Colors by GFB Group/GFB.it) The mysterious ruins of Kuthchemes. Shevatas (a Zamorian master-thief) finds a treasure. Thugra Khotan, the dark sorcerer who had reigned in Kuthchemes three thousand years ago, wakes up and kills Shevatas.  Khotan, who wants to rule the world, renames himself Natohk, the Veiled One; for his features were always masked.  Natohk amasses an army of nomads and teams-up with a rebellious Stygian prince (Katuman/Kutamun). Natohk lusts for princess Yasmela...

Doctor Doom wants General Ursus to be the new ruler of the Planet of the Apes. Doom gifts Ursus with a suit of armor. Zaius loses his cool, he fights with Cornelius and Dr. Zira. Sue Storm (The Invisible Woman), Cornelius, Zira and Zaius fish George Taylor's submerged spacecraft (The Icarus/Liberty 1) out of the water. Two Super-Apes (Peotor (orangutan) and Igor (baboon)) attack our heroes! Zaius calms and befriends the Super-Apes.  Reed Richards (Mister Fantastic) deduces that they are on Earth... in the future. Ape City. Soldier Apes begin to shoot at the wrathful farmers who have seized the city. President Gaius (supreme leader of Ape City) decides not to flee from the angry mob. Ursus incinerates the guards of Gaius. The Red Ghost (Russian scientist Ivan Kragoff, the brain behind the farmer uprising/rebellion) knocks out Gaius. The reign of puppet President Ursus has commenced. What I did like: A letters page (Parcels of the Apes)! Marvellous covers by Greg Land/Rachelle Rosenb...

What you'll find inside McSweeney's issue no. sixty-nine: The New Toe by Zach Williams (A two-year-old grows an extra toe.) Asymptote by Siqi Liu (A widow and her daughter wait for the world to end.) 18 or 34 Miles from Perennial Square by Max Delsohn (A feral frank appears in the forest.) A Fable by John Lee Clark (Blind men and an elephant, reimagined.) Stuffed Cabbage Man by Julie Hecht (A writer remembers her neighbours.) This is Not Miami by Fernanda Melchor/Translated by Sophie Hughes (Dockworkers in Veracruz assist stowaways.) Scraps by Leila Renee (A heartbroken girl licks her wounds in a KFC.) True, False, Floating by Mel Kassel (Rib reading is the new palmistry.) An Audacious Man by Evan James (Daring to be bold.) The Reanimator by Mikkel Rosengaard (DMs from the dead.) The New Maite by Yohanca Delgado (A woman comes across a clone of herself.) The Starlight by Lydi Conklin (A pterodactyl crashes into a Pegasus and surmounting selfishness.) The Nominal Sca...

What you'll actually find inside this "parody of a grief manual" by Jason Roeder (a former senior editor and senior writer at The Onion): INTRODUCTION: Devastation Perfected Five Grieving Visualization Power Postures  A Short History of Grief CHAPTER I: Hospitals: Pregaming for Grief  A Hospital Who's Who Health Care Directives (treatments that may be used) Know Your Hospital Televisions Hospice Care Last Words That Wow Using a Last Word Service CHAPTER II: Fun with Aftermath  A List of Funerals, Caskets and Headstones Surefire Eulogy Starters Experiencing Grief (Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance) A Short History of The Never-Released Sixth Stage of Grief How Much Am I Allowed To Blame God? A State-By-State Breakdown Grief Speed Run Dealing with Regrets Visiting The Grave Rating Grief with The Chili Pepper System Dealing with Belongings (Keep, Sell, Donate, etc.) Grief and Toxic Relationships Grieving for Pets A Pupa Press "Books by Insects for Th...

eBook by Robbie MacNiven Cover by E. M. Gist  From Titan Books, Heroic Signatures & Conan Properties International LLC Spoilers! Spoilers!  Conan of Cimmeria is aware that a former cabin boy of Captain Zaporavo (killed by Conan in The Pool of the Black One) of the Wastrel is aboard the Heir of Argus.  Conan is also aware that the cabin boy is actually runaway Princess Elyka (the youngest daughter of King Codrin Saldius of Nemedia who fled Belverus (capital city of the kingdom of Nemedia)).  Conan joins the Zingaran and Argossean crew of the Heir of Argus in Messantia (capital port city of Argos). The captain of the Heir of Argus learns that Conan is wanted by Strom (who will die in The Black Stranger) of the Red Hand/King of the Barachans/Lord of the pirate city of Tortage. Brought in chains to Tortage, Conan makes sure that everyone hears that his cabin boy buddy is Princess Elyka.  Captain Gavrali (of Corinthia) kidnaps Conan (to sell him on Sark's Isle) a...

eBook by Cavan Scott Cover by Guillem H. Pongiluppi  Illustrations by Patrick Zircher  From Titan Books and Heroic Signatures Spoilers! Spoilers!  Solomon Kane is returning home to Devonshire, the Puritan hears laughter upon the moor. Green Hart tavern in Challaton Worthy (near Brambleheath). Solomon meets Henry Worle (a local woodcutter) who is wearing a charm made of rowan (a Faerie tree and a protection against pixy magic). Marcus Brampton and Gerald stumble into the tavern, victims of a sprite (fairies) attack. Little Masie Wilkins was left behind. Kane and Worle enter Whist Wood, they rescue Masie from a swarm of laughing pixies/Strikkan. Kane and Worle find the Fairyland gateway (a Whitethorn/Hawthorn and a Blackthorn/Sloe with their thorns tangled together). Solomon starts cutting down the Whitethorn, the Strikkan assail Kane and strip him of his axe and weapons and take Worle away.  Kane is pulled into the portal. In the realm of the Strikkan, Solomon sees a ...

Sword-brothers, sword-sisters, your local spinner rack is once again exhibiting another brand new issue of SSOC!  Sixty-four startling pages of barbaric savagery in black-and-white printed on newsprint paper! Inside this attractive magazine you will find the following: Puritanical art pin-ups: Solomon Kane by Luke Eidenschink Solomon Kane by Ace Continuado CONAN: THE BLUE ORCHID by Roy Thomas and Roberto de la Torre An ancient Hyrkanian castle on the Zaporoska river, recently seized by Yezdigerd the Prince of Turan. Atta of Shadizar (a Zamorian thief) and Conan cannot locate the Blue Orchid diamond (a gigantic jewel from Khitai, supposedly acquired months ago in Makkalet (Conan the Barbarian (1970) #26) by Yezdigerd), so Atta helps himself to a vase and some gems and Conan nicks a necklace. Zaria and three Hyrkanians (Sulimar, Arafam and Stafah/Stapha who are also interested in obtaining the Blue Orchid) witness Conan and Atta emerging from the river. Turanian horse archers kill th...

Spoilers! Spoilers!  CHAPTER 16 (book 3 of 18): A Farewell Drink The Bat (aka Kōmori) of Kai (a ninja assassin from the Takeda clan based in Kai Province who was disfigured by Oda Nobunaga (1534-1582) in Azuchi Castle) has arrived in Kanazawa. Hotaru (aka Firefly the female ninja) is now living with Maeda Keiji (inspired by real-life samurai Maeda Toshimasu (1543-1612)).  The Bat of Kai (who is Hotaru's former ninja tutor and an opium addict) drugs Hotaru to make her poison Keiji, she commits suicide via secret Seppuku. Keiji promises to slay ALL Kaga ninjas. CHAPTER 17: High on Rage Keiji cremates Hotaru's body.  Ninja master "Flying (tobi)" Kato (Kato Danzo (1503-1569)) of the Takeda clan (Uesugi Kenshin (1530-1578) wanted Danzo killed because he was too skilled) and the Fuma clan, kills some of Yotsui Shume (leader of the Kaga ninja army of Keiji's uncle. An homage to actor Jack Nicholson)'s men with his Tang sword (Tang Dao). The Bat of Kai challenges Keij...

Jim Zub's Ghosts & Echoes part 2: Trail of the Warrior SON OF THE TOOTH (an assassin serving The Woeful Eye) is tracking Conan across Shem. SON OF THE TOOTH knows that Conan destroyed Thulsa Doom aka The Necromancer-King of the BLACK STONE (way back in Conan the Barbarian (2023) #12). SON OF THE TOOTH is disappointed that Conan is just a man working as a mercenary in Khoraja (southeast of Koth). SON OF THE TOOTH spies on Conan as Dunick the Kothian picks a fight with Conan. Conan breaks Dunick's arm. SON OF THE TOOTH spies on Conan as the barbarian beds a bar wench. SON OF THE TOOTH spies on Conan as Conan kills Dunick's accomplices and a defenceless Dunick. Conan pays the city's sentries to look the other way. SON OF THE TOOTH spies on Conan as Conan enjoys a meal and drinks FOUR carafes of vino. The still sober Cimmerian finally confronts SON OF THE TOOTH! We learn that Conan and SON OF THE TOOTH share an interest in voyeurism. Do Conan and SON OF THE TOOTH become...

President Gaius (supreme leader of Ape City) sends Cornelius and Dr. Zira to jail. The Red Ghost (Russian scientist Ivan Kragoff) entices unappreciated farmers to attack Ape City. Dr. Zaius and General Ursus break Dr. Zira, Cornelius and The Fantastic Four out of prison. They decide to locate George Taylor (who grew up in Fort Wayne, Indiana)'s sunken spaceship (The Icarus/Liberty 1).  Ben Grimm mentions Rabbi Lowenthal and quotes 1 Samuel 16:7 (But the Lord said unto Samuel, Look not on his countenance, or on the height of his stature; because I have refused him: for the Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart.).  Johnny Storm enters Taylor's ship and stumbles upon the mummified corpse of Lieutenant Maryann Stewart.  The hot-headed General Ursus decides to go back (on his own) to Ape City, to defend it from the wrathful farmers. Assisted by Miklho the gorilla Super-Ape, Doctor Doom intercepts General Ursus...

The year is 26 CE. Tektons (craftsmen/builders), including a young Yeshua/Jesus of Nazareth and three of his siblings (Joses/Joseph, Jude and Simon (Mark 6:3; Matthew 13:55)), have been hired to rebuild the city of Sepphoris (inspired by Matthew 5:14) by Herod Antipas (the Tetrarch of Galilee and Perea under the Roman Empire during the reign of Tiberius Caesar (Luke 3:1)). During the day, Jesus is suffering from headaches caused by divine visions (John 5:20) of the past (we glimpse the destruction of Sepphoris by Publius Quinctilius Varus). Pontius Pilate, the fifth governor of the Roman province of Judaea mentions Caiaphas (Jesus will be sent before the high priest after his arrest (Matthew 26:57; Mark 14:53; John 11:49; John 18:14)) who was appointed by Valerius Gratus (the prefect who preceded Pilate). Jesus has a nightmare, he sees SIX (Revelation 13:18; The sixth commandment is "Thou shalt not kill" (Exodus 20:13)) serpents within the clouds of heaven.  Jesus ventures in...

eBook by Tim Waggoner Cover by E. M. Gist  From Titan Books, Heroic Signatures & Conan Properties International LLC Spoilers! Spoilers!  The eastern desert of Shem. Conan and some sellswords are guarding a Turanian trading caravan, a decoy to lure Zuagir raiders into a trap. Almost all of the mercenaries perish at the hands of the Zuagirs.  Conan, Solfrid (a female Vanir from Vanaheim), Endrigo (a Kothian) and Danor (a Shemite-Stygian) are the only four who survive the raid.  Conan wants to go back to Ashaka (caravan city of the Turanians) to claim the rest of his remuneration for guarding the bogus caravan. Conan's camel detects the scent of an oasis with doum palm trees. Near the water hole, Conan and Co. find a possible hidden treasure cache... marked by a vulture's head (the sigil of the demon: "The Lord of Silence"). Later, vulture headed eyeless mist creatures attack. Conan, Solfrid and Endrigo get scratched, but Danor swallows one of scavenger things and d...

Jim Zub's Ghosts & Echoes part 1: The Sharpened Tooth (of The Woeful Eye) Conan the Barbarian is not showing up in his own comic book this month! Let's find out why that is. This is the origin story of SON OF THE TOOTH (a loyal assassin serving The Woeful Eye).  The Hyrkanian Steppes. SON OF THE TOOTH is born, the 11th child of a tribe leader, weak, small and plagued by nightmares and throbbing toothaches caused by The Woeful Eye.  SON OF THE TOOTH kills one of his older brothers. SON OF THE TOOTH removes a canine tooth (canines are also called EYE teeth) from his brother's jaw for The Woeful EYE and hides his brother's body. Like Michael Myers (from Halloween (1978 film)), SON OF THE TOOTH kills one of his older sisters and like Michael Myers, the more he kills, the stronger he becomes. SON OF THE TOOTH kills the rest of his siblings. SON OF THE TOOTH goes on a hunting trip with his father, he tells his dad that he is the one who murdered his brothers and sisters. ...