Predator: The Original Screenplay adaptation by Jeremy Barlow and Patrick Blaine is still unpublished, so I have to review this gory Percy comic instead. I can make it. I can make it.
Our Yautja from last issue is still obsessed with Wolverine. The trophy hunting extraterrestrial really wants Logan's mint out of package adamantium spine for his collection. If you're a collector you know what I'm talking about. Sadly, we get zero retractable claws vs retractable claws action this issue. Who will be the best there is at what they do? Do I really have to ask the question?
What I did like:
Wolverine is an arachnologist, he knows the sounds spiders make, knows about ticks. Impressive.
Alabama ticks get mentioned.
Old Painless clears the jungle once again.
Sabretooth avenges Jesse Ventura. He did the former Governor of Minnesota proud.
The Predator (1987) score by Alan Silvestri is still playing in my head. Maybe I should see a doctor.
What I did not like:
Canada. Just Canada. It's a big place Canada, be more specific, it's actually offensive to a Canadian.
Wolverine getting poetic in his prose about the Predator that's trying to kill him. LOL.
"@&%# off" should be "@&%# me" instead. Get your swearing straight.
Way too much swearing. Excessive even.
Censored swearing.
Spiders do not have mandibles, they have chelicerae. Wolverine should know this.
The female mutant is easily and quickly killed. Lame. The Predator universe features strong women that do not lose their heads. Percy should know this.
Predators not talking amongst themselves. Some nice Predator banter would have been appreciated. For example: I hope my dog is not tearing up my place while I'm out with you guys on this hunting trip. Are those mutants sporting authentic Liefeld pouches? Your ex-girlfriend was as clingy as a Facehugger, bro.
The Predator holding the arm of the dying Predator would have lost his thumb.
The Weapon X facility massacre. A Predator would never expose himself in such a way and even decloaking inside the facility? Really?
Still no Jean-Claude Van Damme homage!
I give it a 1/10. I recommend keeping your hard-earned $5.99 to buy 2 copies of Predator Versus Wolverine #3 to support Japanese Transformers artist superstar Kei Zama!